Stabilize First
Before we solve anything, we get you regulated. Escalation, fear, and grief make even smart people act against their own interests. We slow that down so you can think clearly.
1-on-1 Divorce Coaching
The pain is real.So is the way through.
The grief hits when you don't expect it. The anger keeps you up at night. You're making decisions about your kids, your money, your future, and nothing feels clear. Tonya Lanthier works with you 1-on-1 to help you stop reacting and start deciding. There is a process for this.
Tonya Lanthier
"I chose clarity over chaos, intention over revenge, and structure over emotional free-fall."
Completely Confidential
No Judgment, Just Support
Protects Children First
Clarity Before Conflict
"When I was going through my divorce, I had lawyers, I had therapists - but no one who could sit with me at 10pm and say: here's what to do before tomorrow's meeting. That's what coaching is."
Danielle T
What Coaching Actually Is
It's not therapy. It's not legal advice. It's the missing piece between the two.
The pain of divorce shows up everywhere. The grief that hits in the middle of a normal Tuesday. The anger that makes you want to send that text at 10pm. The fear that you're going to make the wrong decision about your kids, your money, your future. That's what coaching is built for.
We work on the real stuff, the custody conversation you're dreading, the financial decision that keeps you up at night, the moment you're about to react instead of respond. Not theory. Not someday. What's happening right now.
This isn't a course. There's no curriculum. It's a person in your corner who understands escalation, grief, and decision-making under pressure, and who helps you make each decision from clarity instead of fear.
How It Works
What a coaching sessionactually looks like
No curriculum. No modules. Each session is built around what's happening in your life right now - the decision you're facing, the conversation you're dreading, the thing keeping you up at night.
Work the Real Problem
Custody exchange going sideways? Threatening lawyer email? Financial anxiety at 2am? We work on what's actually happening this week - not a textbook scenario.
Leave with a Next Step
Not vague homework. A concrete action: what to say in that text, how to handle tomorrow's meeting, when to involve a lawyer and when to hold off. You leave knowing exactly what to do.
Coaching vs. Everything Else
You've probably alreadytried some of this
Lawyers manage the conflict after it escalates. Therapists help you process the emotions. Coaching does the thing in between: it helps you make decisions from clarity instead of fear, before things get worse.
Tonya's coaching focuses on behavioral awareness, emotional regulation, and real-time execution. Not mindset. Not motivation. Decisions.
Lawyers & TherapistsCoaching with Tonya
Lawyers
Legal rights / emotional processing
Real-time decisions & de-escalation
Timing
After conflict escalates
Before it gets worse
Approach
Who's right / how you feel
Who stays regulated
Output
Legal filings / emotional insight
A clear next step you can act on today
Goal
Win the case / process the grief
Protect your kids, finances, and future
Who Coaching Is For
You might need coaching if...
No curriculum. No modules. Each session is built around what's happening in your life right now - the decision you're facing, the conversation you're dreading, the thing keeping you up at night.
Coaching is for you if...
You want your divorce handled calmly and intentionally - not through endless arguing- You care about protecting your children, your mental health, and your financial future
- You keep reacting emotionally and want help pausing before you respond
- You're facing real decisions right now - custody, finances, mediation - and can't afford to wait
- You believe peace is more powerful than proving a point
Coaching isn't the right fit if...
You want to punish your ex or "win" at all costs- You're not willing to take responsibility for your own emotional state
- You expect someone else to manage your reactions for you
- You're looking for legal advice or therapy - coaching is neither, and Tonya will tell you when you need those instead
Why Tonya
What makes her qualified to coach you through this
Her career in healthcare taught her something most divorce professionals miss: people don't make bad decisions because they're uninformed. They make bad decisions because their nervous system is overwhelmed. Escalation, fear, and unmanaged grief are what drive conflict - not lack of intelligence or good intentions.
That's what makes her coaching different. She doesn't just talk you through your options - she helps you get regulated enough to actually evaluate them. She recognizes escalation patterns before they become blow ups. She understands grief stages well enough to know when you're making decisions from anger vs. clarity.
And she's done it herself. Not in theory - in real life, while running a company, raising children, and navigating a co-parenting relationship that most people said was impossible.
Behavioral Escalation Awareness- Grief-Stage Decision Making
- Real Divorce Experience
Start Here
Let's discuss what's happening.
No commitment. No sales pitch. Tell me where you are, and I'll tell you if I can help. If coaching isn't the right fit, I'll say so.
Tonya Lanthier
Responds personally within 48 hours
You don't need to have your situation figured out before reaching out. That's what coaching is for. Tell me where you are, what's weighing on you, and we'll go from there.
Fill Out the Coaching FormNot ready for coaching? Join the app waitlist instead - it's free.
Completely private. Your information is never shared or sold.